“It’s Your Loss”

To a world of the working class full of rejections…

Photo by Engin Akyurt from Pexels

I recently received a rejection mail from a company I applied to sometime in May. I already was tired of waiting to hear from them so I didn’t care when I saw the rejection mail.

Exactly 3 hours later, something mind-blowing happened. I received a mail inviting me for an interview — another company wanted to get to know me. How Ironic!

You may agree with me that receiving rejection emails has to be the most difficult part of job hunting. This single experience has taught me one thing — To not confuse a single failure with a final defeat.

For me, it’s not been easy dealing with being rejected for a job I know that I clearly would do perfectly well in. But this one felt different. Rather than feel sorry for me, I just moved on from the mail, archived it, and went back to studying.

Some call it ‘ a job’, some refer to it as ‘work’.

Some people allow their job titles to define them, some work at their dream jobs, while the others keep struggling with rejections.

Every day for the worker is a struggle to either keep working or to stop. We question ourselves, our jobs. ‘Am I doing the right thing’, What if I apply for this job and never get it? What if I don’t do well at this interview? How do I handle burnout from work?

For me, my struggle has been with handling rejection mails.

As I sit by my table side to sulk about my most recent interview process, all I can think about is how hard “Work and working” both are.

Every day, there is a need for me to get up from bed irrespective of how much hurt, pain, or tired I am. I give my work my all and I count on my days constantly looking forward to that one opportunity, that one shot that changes everything for me about how and why I work.

I know I am supposed to be a princess and like every princess, need some fine gentleman that sweeps me off my feet and takes me to a castle where I live forever happily ever after.

However, It is different for me. I love to work. I have lots of ideas. I know I can change the world, maybe not immediately and not by myself but I’ve got what it takes, so why is it so hard getting an opportunity that just sweeps me off my feet?

What’s so wrong with wanting to work at a place where I am valued and my work speaks and matters?

My experiences hunting for jobs have been eventful but in all, I am learning to deal with rejections. I may never get used to it, but I am stronger with every new rejection mail.

Before now…

I think the one reason why I always got affected by rejection emails comes with the fact that growing up as a kid, I was smart, intelligent, and always outperformed my peers. I was always applauded for every hard work, I got a promotion into the next class. But as an adult it was different, I had to study, work hard, work smart, and still be rejected for opportunities I knew I deserved.

In the past 21 months, I have received enough rejection emails to last me a lifetime, and the most painful was one from Outreachy. It was my first real application just after I graduated from college. After putting so much work into it, I didn’t get in. I cried myself to sleep that night and even promised myself never to apply again(That’s a lie though, I am applying for the next cohort😎).

Applying for a job is a big deal to me and it hurt me differently when I get rejected because I know how much effort I put in when I apply for a role. I take my time to research the company, see how they operate, what the employees are talking about on social media, who the hiring manager is, and finally prepare a new resume and cover letter specifically for the role.

And after all the hard work and waiting for days, weeks and sometimes months, these companies come with the template “Unfortunately, we cannot…”. I often hear people complain about these things, but I never really understood until I received my first, second, third, tenth, twentieth rejection mail, and now I lost count.

Right now, I am learning to not beat myself up anymore but rather, I’ll apply to more opportunities and accept the outcomes because rather than show me my failures, my rejection emails show me that I try.

What changed?

Uhmmmm, nothing changed!

Or I’ll say, my mindset changed.

After I got my first job as a flutter developer intern, I figured I was good, and regardless of whom or what anyone thought of me from reading my resume, it didn’t matter. I was a complete package and I wasn’t gonna feel sorry for myself anymore.

Besides, that paper(resume) is the only thing they may know about me and this paper doesn’t have one-third of who I am and what I can do😥.

In April, I landed a technical writing role out of over 80 applications and then I said “Cynthia, you can never cry or feel sorry that you aren’t talented for a role”. I failed to keep to that self-talk, I cried recently because of another missed opportunity.

But from now onwards, I will apply with an open mind. And I’d say “If you don’t hire me, it’s your loss”. And I click send and move on. I am not 100% grown, but It feels better now.

How do you deal with rejection mails?

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Cynthia Peter

Cynthia Peter

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A mind learning to live one moment at a time. I am finding my path as a developer💙 and Writer. I write about my journey, musings, lessons, and then growth.🚀